Flippin Macs
Now that the Hot Talk down at the Diner has moved on from the IRS taking too long to give Tea Party groups their 501-C-4 status so they don’t have to pay taxes or even tell who they get their money from while they advocate for all those ‘non-political’ issues they’ve got, the table pounders have taken up immigration once more. A lot of the Diner’s customers are Latinos in for lunch between lawn shifts, mostly quiet fellas who sit toward the back by the restrooms. They order a la carte or sometimes the Broken Plate Special. Their English is okay, but at their table, the language slows down when they order, no longer native. By far they’re the most polite customers in the joint and they leave modest tips, double what most of the locals leave, according to Anita, the lunch waitress.
Most of the immigration debate takes place at the breakfast forums, before the lawn crews come in — and if they should stop by to fill a thermos with coffee — the topic is tabled until they leave. The Hispanics must think us Anglos are one sleepy crowd until our caffeine kicks in. Sleepy and obviously without any apparent jobs. Retired and rich, they must think — and by their standards , they’re right.
“No damn amnesty for these illegals!” Nils responds to any all arguments. “You never see white boys framing houses anymore,” Jerry, back in a window booth pipes in. Jerry pretty much doesn’t see the sunny side of anything, not even the eggs he orders every morning easy over. “They can’t work for what these aliens work for!”
Big Larry, out from behind his grill, who works for pretty much what ‘those aliens’ work for, points a greasy spatula at Jerry across a sea of tanned white faces. “Nobody here wants those jobs, Jerry. They wanna sit jockey on a computer screen and make 6 figures, not throw a two pound framing hammer all day.” Ernie, who ramrods Ernie’s Custom Remodels, agrees. “Last gringo kid I hired — at $16 an hour — lasted til lunch. Said he could make twice that with his Mac. I figure he’ll do it with a Mac all right, a Big Mac, tossin burgers.”
Ernie looks quickly at Big Larry and says “No offense, Larry.” Larry shakes his head wearily. “None taken. You fellas enjoy your naps today,” he says and smiles a sad smile. “It’s a hard life out there in the jungle.”
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