autobahn to stanwoodopolis
We been watching a new trend developing lately down here on the South End: Biodiesel. Taking farmlands and using them to grow fuel instead of food. Now, I don’t know what YOUR rig gets per gallon, but I guess most of us Americans want a Bradley Fighting Vehicle to go shopping in war-torn Stanwoodopolis, don’t care WHAT it costs in gas so long as it’s cheaper per gallon than designer bottled water.
I hear a lot of complaining now that gas prices are at an all time high. I guess we thought a democratic Iraq would be so grateful they’d give us free oil and we’d ALL be driving full size Hummers. I even heard an oil company last week complaining they didn’t have the money for any more cleanup penalties from the Valdez spill. Tough times for all of us, I guess.
So maybe it IS the right time to take food and turn it into fuel. Gas stations’ll look more like a fast food drive-up. Tomato diesel, hi octane fryer fat, corn on the cob unleaded, you want to supersize that fill-up, ma’am?
The burger chains are already teamed up with the gas stations on this. Way ahead of us. Pump the deep fat fryers into you AND your car. A full service station means they got a health clinic in back to handle clogged arteries, get you back on the road in no time flat.
Cutting down on the driving or cutting down on the car size or cutting down on the calories just isn’t the South End way, I guess. If it means cutting down our old growth nettle forests to make biodiesel, by god, we’re gonna do it. Might as well — we’ll need the acreage for the new autobahn into Stanwood.
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