The Skeeter Daddle Diaries

Thank God for medical science and the pharmacological industry. Finally, finally, they’ve discovered a weight loss drug. Turns out the medication for managing sugar levels in diabetes also kills the user’s appetite. Just what our narcissistic society needs in these turbulent times, an easy way to shed those pounds. No muss, no fuss, no exercise necessary. If you haven’t bought stock in the companies manufacturing this cure, sell your crypto right now and get a few shares. The very thing that makes you thin will make you rich….

We all think we’re overweight. We’re all a little anorexic. How could it be otherwise when we’re bombarded by fashion models and professional athletes, slim, fit, svelte, buffed, beautiful people. By comparison, hell yeah, we all ought to lose a few pounds, skip dessert, stop eating crap, get off the couch and head to the gym. But c’mon, this national pathology of poor self-esteem, all this fat shaming, the proliferation of diet fads and weightwatcher memberships, the obsession of all things weighed in pounds, it’s time to throw away the bathroom scales, stop checking the mirror and grow up, learn to live in your own skin and quit judging others.

So yeah, thanks Oprah, thanks for plastering your svelte new figure on your magazine and half the rags in America, telling your listeners and your readers how finally, finally, you can move beyond your shame at being the ideal weight you have in your fantasy. Just get that new drug, skip the exercise and the latest diet, shed your fat and hey, you too can be Oprah or whatever other role model you pick from People magazine, your shame will dissolve like an icicle in the sun. Happy days are finally here. And Oprah, thanks again for Dr. Phil and that other nutcase, Oz. Happy now?

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