The Skeeter Daddle Diaries

Fresh off his victorious mistrial for sexual assault using quaaludes to drug his victims, Bill Cosby’s crack publicity team announced the National Funny Man would go on the road to conduct town hall meetings to educate us men on how to avoid being falsely accused of sexual misconduct. Presumably he would inform us how to court and spark with pharmaceuticals and not be convicted. At least not convicted on the first trial with a hung jury. If the second goes badly, Fat Albert may want to change the focus to something more attuned to his prison audience’s needs.

I guess Cosby has been watching politics lately judging by this chutzpah. If you’re caught in a lie, call your accuser the liar. If they tweet back, threaten them with lawsuits. If that doesn’t work, ramp up the lie. No doubt in my mind the President will offer courses at Trump University to help student/citizens avoid lawsuits on real estate deals that were fraudulent, on impeachments that were trumped up, on collusions that were really more egregiously done by others. Deny deny deny, but then go on the offensive. Blame the press, blame the jury, blame the crybaby liberals, blame those mean Democrats and those bitchy women. If you can’t rape em yourself, well, maybe there’s benefit in showing others how to do it. For fun and profit.

Cosby won’t pull this off, of course. Trump probably will. Donald has honed these skills from childhood and he has plenty of help now from the courageous profiles of his Republican shills. Plus, he’s already set up Trump U. The man is so far ahead of Cosby’s game, he makes Fat Albert look like a grossly obese donut addict starting his first marathon. The public has already judged Fat Albert, a ruined icon of American comedy, once a role model, now his own joke.

Trump, so far nobody’s laughing. But when we realize we’ve been fed date rape drugs and violated, when the drugs wear off, all the courses in his little faux University won’t help him either. Probably still make Time magazine’s Man of the Year and he’ll call it a Huge Success.

Hits: 319