The Skeeter Daddle Diaries

If you were dreading another two years of the interminable election cycle, probably canceling your newspapers and substituting subscriptions to entertainment channels, plugging your ears and avoiding MSNBC and maybe waiting  til the dust clears in 2024 before pulling the quilts down from over your head and leaving your bed … well, you got some good news.  Trump plans to tip the checkerboard for the Republicans, the House is going to divide up sides for some serious tag team no-holds-barred smackdown wrestling, and you can expect some cliff hanger serials with plenty of violence and mayhem to get you through those lonely nights coming up.  Trump is running again and you best believe the Republicans are going to war with themselves.

I guess if you honestly believe Trump won the last election, well, hell, run him again.  Just make sure the voting machines aren’t cooked, the dead aren’t voting,  the ballots aren’t stuffed, the mail-ins are banned, the gerrymandering continues, the lines in the inner cities are long and the polling places few.  Just to get the ball rolling, the President-in-Exile announced from his palace in Mar-a-Lago that the new slogan for his campaign will be — cue the trumpets— Make America Great and Glorious Again.  I guess that first term of his didn’t really make the cut.  Maybe hold off on the Glorious and get the Great accomplished.  Or … I don’t know, triple down and Make America Great and Glorious and Glamorous Again.  Just need a bigger ballcap to read MAGAGAG.  Costs slightly more, all proceeds going to the Trump charity.

Down in Florida they must be drinking the swamp water, all I can figure.  DeSantis runs ads that on the 8^th Day the Lord made a warrior.  Him.  Not to be outdone, Trump wants a glorious second coming, another Rome with him as Caesar.  Must be some biblical prophecy needing fulfilled for these guys.  If the Lord is working overtime now, adding days to Her week to get the job done, maybe it’s time to take a rest.

You were probably thinking you deserve a rest.  Sorry, looks like a long slog from here to election day 2024.  Like they say, it ain’t over til the Fatboy squeals.  Or something like that.  Might be a fine time to read some good books.

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The mizzus and me were thinking of having an Election Party this mid-term. Serve up some bubbly and hopefully celebrate a Blue Wave. But then we remembered the last two election parties we had, one where Trump thumped Hillary and the other where Gore lost to Bush. Now, I like a good cry as well as the next man, but three in a row, not so much. So we’re going to skip that party and hope our luck changes for the better.

Trump is on the stump now. Hell if I know who’s running the country while he’s jetting to the red states with his little red MAGA cap, maybe Kellyanne, maybe Sarah Sanders. All I know is he can’t do as much damage on the road. And even he seems to understand that if this election goes Blue, his next two years he can look forward to some real investigations, not the pretend ones we have now. What is in those tax returns he’s waiting for the audit to conclude before showing us how the Master of the Deal evades paying anything. While we’re at it, maybe take a look at those emoluments, at the nepotism, at the Russian connections, at the Hillary e-mails that turned up in Trump’s campaign committee, at a few of those business deals of his.

Goodbye to the ‘pass’ the GOP gave him for two years if that happens, hello to Bob Mueller’s detailed results of his investigation. Course, if it’s a Red Wave, it’s crying time again. We’ll get the message that Trump wasn’t just some anomaly where the electorate wanted to shake things up and he was the monkey wrench. We’ll discover the majority in this country love a thug, a bully, a dog-whistling demagogue who prefers dictators far more than the democracy he intends to subvert.

I’m optimistic the country made a mistake two years ago and now realize the damage done. I’m hopeful we’ll right the ship of state and send Trump’s enablers packing for their new lobbying jobs. But I’m too cynical to be confident. Trump showed me what this country can easily become. And worse, what it already is. We’ll see shortly if we’ve seen an even darker future. Meanwhile, we’re skipping the party.

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