The Skeeter Daddle Diaries

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For various reasons I’ve been flying the not-so-friendly skies lately. Costa Rica, Utah, Wisconsin with plenty more on the way. Burning a lot of my carbon credits, for sure, if you’re the type who pays attention to such things. Okay, if you’re a ‘liberal’, the people who believe we’re spewing CO2 into the atmosphere at a rate that’s warming the world, melting glaciers, imperiling the polar bears and creating beachfronts where skyscrapers once stood. I guess I plead guilty to being one of those.

Lately I’ve been reading how jets are pretty huge culprits toward contributing to Global Warming, what we’ve rebranded as Climate Change. I haven’t done the math comparing airline travel vs. automobile or even trips by donkey, but I suspect jets use an inordinate amount of fuel and spew a lot of greenhouse gas and now I feel guilty every time I take a trip … even as folks like Elon Musk race toward space tourism. Pony up a quarter million dollars, in a year or two you’ll blast into earth orbit, leaving behind a carbon footprint the size of a brontosaurus herd. Meanwhile cruise boats are navigating the icepack for the well-heeled to venture down to Antarctica, helping to melt the place.

Course, half the folks who don’t believe in man-caused climate change do believe in chem-trails, the crackpot theory that the government is unloading poisons on us via commercial jets. Don’t ask me what the poisons are or what their nefarious intent is. And certainly don’t ask me why these conspiracy theorists don’t equate chem trails with Global Warming. If I could see into their minds, I would be hopelessly ensnared in a tightening morass of insanity and paranoia, no doubt leading to my vote in 2020 to re-elect Donald Trump as Pharaoh of the Planets.

What’s a concerned citizen to do? Walk to work? My work today is in Utah, 1350 miles from home. I could get a horse but equine flatulence has its own deleterious climate effect. I gotta tell you, living in a country that doesn’t even believe in Climate Change, it’s hard to know what the Responsible Course of Action is short of not having babies. There’s just a whole lot of us humans and most of us can’t afford to leave for the moon. The moon, of course, could use a little warming. Maybe instead of Antarctica, us liberals should plan now for our lunar vacations. Not much air but way less chem trails. At least for now.

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