Fair and Unbalanced
You maybe don’t watch as much Fox News as some sectors of the American Public so it’s altogether possible you missed Sean Hannity ranting and raving about Mueller’s overreach when he confiscated Trump’s attorney Michael Cohen’s personal files. Time to end the investigation! the Fox commentator yowled. Time to lock up the traitor James Comey! he growled. Time to end the Witch Hunt! he hollered.
Funny how things turn out in this Trump era. Up is down. Down is kind of the high point. So when the Trump Team lost its bid to have the Cohen trove kept secret, the name of the client who didn’t want his name revealed to the public was ultimately revealed. Surprise, surprise, as Gomer Pyle used to say. It was our favorite Trump apologist and bromancer, the fair and balanced Sean Hannity. So what does Mr. Hannity say to all this, you ask. He says Mr. Cohen was not his attorney in any legal sense of the term.
Like me you probably find that an odd parsing of words. Not my attorney in any legal sense of the word? Just an attorney in what sense, then. A fixer? An unpaid attorney? A pal? Methinks something here is amiss. You know, and I do too, the best is yet to come. Mr. Cohen knows where the bodies are buried, where the women have been paid their hush money are, who set up the meetings in Prague, why the President is jittery about Russia. If this were a made for TV series — and trust me, it will be if it isn’t actually one already — Monsieur Cohen would turn up dead in Episode 23. Can’t have him turning State’s witness. Add to that those tapes he liked to record, god only knows what jewels lay waiting in those ready to be uncovered.
Trump Fawlty Towers. It’s going to make Watergate look like a one season flop. This one’s got it all. Foreign intrigue, mob bosses, porn stars, Playboy models knocked up and paid to have an abortion, political gamesmanship, lies and more lies, one great big soap opera full of twists and turns, pathos and comedy. American Entertainment! Start stocking the popcorn, we ain’t seen nothin yet.
If I was writing this series, Sean Hannity would commit suicide before the rest of Cohen’s dossier comes out. Just a suggestion, of course, but he and the Fox Friends will probably see if they can weather the investigations. Good luck, Sean, and Good Night.
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Tags: D.C. Soap Opera, Michael Cohen Turns State Witness, Sean Hannity, Trump Fawlty Towers
I’d even settle for one short episode ending on a high note (for Fox viewers) where Hannity hangs up the rusty old microphone, in order to spend more time with his family. And less time with his conflicts of interest (for everyone else).
Remember the bad old days when CBS hauled Dan Rather’s ass thru the coals of public opinion for daring to run a story about George W skipping out on his military service based on some bogus memo or something he didn’t fact-check before airing it. Seems a little harsh in the Fair and Balanced Era. Now if you fact check it and get caught, just scream Fake News loud, take a vacation for a week and hope the advertisers will stay with you. Hannity might need a slightly longer vacation than one week and I guess we’ll see who his Ad Pimps are when the dust clears….