The Skeeter Daddle Diaries

 

Don’t panic yet, but the rats are here! We killed one yesterday with a trap half the size of a bear trap. But its brethren look in the window at night and climb up the walls looking for an easy entry. Rats. Is there a more loathsome beast? On four legs anyway….?

Some years back we thought we had mice so I set the traps one night and figured we’d be rid of them by breakfast. About 2 in the morning I awoke to the rattle Thump rattle Thump thump of the trap whapping the floor again and again, a deranged clatter disturbing my precious sleep. Wearily, I climbed the stairs bollicky-bare, expecting to find Mickey in the trap still alive. I dreaded whatever mayhem would follow for the Final Solution. Imagine my naked surprise discovering a rat in the mousetrap, big loathsome longtailed rodent, bearer of Black Plagues and bubonic fever. Yiiii!

Without hesitation I grabbed a nearby broom and whacked that rat a couple of good ones. Only to see him free himself from the puny trap he’d previously had no luck escaping from…. Now it was mano y mano, two naked mammals tooth to tooth, broom to hairless tail, both of us hopping wildly, half crazed in the dim kitchen light, whap, slap, whack and then … oh sweet baby Huey, the four legged vermin jumped off the opening to the downstairs, a 10 foot drop to the slate floor and landed … I couldn’t believe it! … at the open door to our bedroom.

Where the mizzus was sleeping the unsuspecting snooze of the guiltless. I took the stairs two at a time, my heart beating ferociously as if I were being hunted, not Mickey Rat. Oh man, that cornered varmint could be anywhere. I listened for scrabbling, I waited in the dark stock still, I wished I had pants on!!! I could hear clocks ticking, the fridge gurgling, a faucet dripping … but no rat sounds. Us two adversaries waited, waited some more, waited just as we have since time immemorial.

Finally I gave up and went to bed. Pulled the covers up over my head. Tight. For the time being, I ceded territory. And sleep. Tomorrow, though … tomorrow we’d see who was boss. Tomorrow, mister, we’d see who wore the pants in this house, yessir. Tomorrow….

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This entry was posted on Monday, December 7th, 2015 at 5:51 pm and is filed under rantings and ravings. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.