Fly Our Friendly Skies

 

Seasons Greetings, Everyone!  CEO Skeeter Daddle here to offer any of you inconvenienced by this Christmas Holiday’s glitches at South End Airlines.  Admittedly this was an inopportune time to experience problems flying to grandma’s house and for that we at South End want to offer our sincere apologies.  As many times as it takes.  Refunds and rebookings may take a little longer, but rest assured, the South End Family will do our darndest to make it up to you.  Lost presents and lost baggage will be found and returned to you and your loved ones.  Think Christmas in January.  After all, no one really knows when Baby Jesus was actually born.  And no one really knows when we’ll get our cancellations straightened out.

We here at Crisis Central want you to know that once we’ve returned to our full schedule, we will be committed to vastly improved service.  You are valued customers and as such we are devoted to keeping you in the air On Time.  This unfortunate holiday meltdown was the result of terrible weather across the country, not, as some have suggested, pilot and crew cutbacks or outdated technologies or our very economic point to point terminal system.  Like our competitors we are dedicated to your safety and our bottom line.  Sure we made incredible profits this last year and of course we could have used that to upgrade systems, hire more personnel and probably charge you for increased baggage fees and fees for the use of our very hygienic bathroom facilities.

That, needless to tell you loyal flyers, is not the South End Way.  Which is why, once again, we want to apologize for God’s winter mess-up this holiday.  Ice and sleet and snowmageddon, let’s face it, you were probably lucky not to face Nature’s wrath out there at grandma’s.  Not that we’re scapegoating the Lord, heaven forbid.  But global warming, well, that’s something all of us are responsible for.  We’re doing our best.  Now it’s time for you all to step up as well.  Happy New Year and see you back in our friendly skies in 2023.  Peace, Skeeter

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